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Submit your revised manuscript to every agent you can find, with a quirky covering letter to grab their attention, and a square of Green and Black's chocolate as a 'reward' for reading the first page of your novel. Women agents love this approach, men prefer hard cash.
Only one month left to wait for their replies. Use the time wisely by surfing the web for all those author interviews where they're asked the question, 'How did you get your agent?' Here are the top answers:
1. I was introduced/recommended
2. I'm a close friend of the family
3. We drink in the same wine bar/go to the same gym
4. I didn't, I self published
5. My father's a rock star/politician/actor
Spotted the missing answer yet? Then you have reached the point in your literary adventure known as - 'the writer's revelation'. It's that moment of surprise and shock I mentioned right at the beginning, when you realise only a microscopic fraction of published authors have been discovered out of that manuscript graveyard that is the agent's slush pile.
As the standard rejection letters begin avalanching onto your doormat, it's time for you to appraise your situation. In the last year, you've made some momentous decisions, applied yourself with diligence and determination, become a competent writer, and produced something of which you are truly proud. Surely this means that you owe it to yourself to make that one final submission? Which is...
...to admit that your reality has turned back into a dream.
The End.
Or is it...
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